![]() Human beings are experts at deception, including self-deception. Grant Brenner, a psychiatrist and co-author of Relationship Sanity: Creating and Maintaining Healthy Relationships, says it’s worth understanding your weaknesses, as a gaslighter would see them: “One of the best ways to combat gaslighting is to be in touch with your inner gaslighter. Having a strong sense of self and conviction in one’s perceptions ensures that the deceptive maneuvering of the stealth abuser will not take hold.” 4) Tap into your inner gaslighter. Trust requires time and shared vulnerability that is grounded and balanced. ![]() Be realistic as to what real intimacy and connection look like. “Do not be swayed by platitudes and accolades. “Protecting oneself from gaslighting requires one to see through seductive maneuvering by being intelligently guarded,” says Sheri Heller, Licensed Clinical Social Worker. It’ll also help to stay in touch with what a real and intimate connection looks like. If something happens and they suspect the other person will attempt to convince them that it didn’t happen, writing it down, along with the date and time, can serve as a reminder that they did experience the incident.” 3) Remember what a real connection looks like. ![]() Julie Williamson, a Licensed Professional Counselor, says you should be mindful of how you feel around the person in question: “Someone can defend against gaslighting by being mindful of what they’re experiencing in their body and what their mind is telling them. Make your mental health a priority and know the sacrifice will ultimately be worth it.” 2) Listen to body cues. “Confide in a trusted friend and realize you may have to make a sacrifice to get out of this relationship dynamic. “Once you recognize what’s going on, I advise my patients to take one step at a time in trying to remove themselves from the situation,” says Psychiatrist Dion Metzger, MD. Here are a few professional tips for identifying and them combatting the manipulation of a friend: 1) Take it slow. In close relationships, like friendships or intimate relationships, you will see a pattern of shaming someone for their choices and potentially also isolating them from forces that could reinforce their worth or objective truths (e.g., isolating a person from other friends, family who can recount truths or see them more clearly).” Combat Your Gaslighting Friends: 5 Tipsīecause we don’t expect those closest to us to deceive and manipulate us in such a way, it can be even more challenging to identify gaslighting behavior among our friends-but it’s important that we do. It’s often about the abuser maintaining control. “Gaslighting is a pattern of shaming and guilting someone to feel inferior or crazy. Jor-El Caraballo, a therapist, explains what gaslighting often looks like in a friendship: Again, one would rarely suspect a friend of gaslighting them, but it does happen. Those who employ it do so for personal gain and often possess narcissistic traits. If you aren’t familiar with this term, gaslighting is manipulating someone using psychological means into doubting their own sanity, intuition, and reality. ![]() The truth of the matter is that those closest to us are those most likely to gaslight us, as this form of manipulation thrives off of intimacy. How to Spot Gaslighting in Close Relationships And employ the ultimate form of manipulation to get what they want from the relationship. Or at least that’s what we can all hope to find in a friend… in reality, our friends can deceive us. You don’t have to spend any ounce of your time with them, but you want to: You enjoy each other’s company you support each other through the triumphs and the losses you really get each other. They say that friends are the family you choose. ![]()
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